As a child I would listen to Kris Kristofferson's Why Me Lord with my grandmother. She revered that song as if it was a modern day hymn, and I couldn't help but request it every time I saw her. The chords, accompanied by Kris' chiseled, sun-beaten voice, felt like an old quilt that I could wrap myself in, and the tune became as familiar to my soul as The Old Rugged Cross. At the time I had no idea how that song would come to represent the essence of my life.
Through my teenage years and into adulthood I, like so many others, began to question the essence of God. Personally, I never doubted His existence, but I did question if He really cared. At the times when I needed Him most I couldn't find him. He was never there when I was trying to get the attention of a young lady. He was never there when I needed my car fixed. The older I got the more I demanded proof, and it never came. By the time I was in my early 30's I was content to walk away from Him.
God uses flawed and broken people to exemplify His glory. Our weakness is His power and strength. So, again, Why Me Lord?
At first blush, the subject matter in From an Inside Out: A Reckoning and Redemption is horrifying, and yet underneath you will find witness to not one, but two miracles. I had demanded proof and in my lowest moment He provided that proof over and over again, and every time He did I would ask again
'Why Me Lord?'
Moses was flawed and broken; not only did he stutter but he was a murderer.
Noah, whom God saved from the flood, had gotten drunk and passed out completely naked.
David, whose adultery was legendary, was chosen to lead His people.
I asked "Why Me Lord" and He answered "Why not?"